Life Lessons from Coaching
When I self-retired from academia three or so years ago and entered an entirely new industry by training to become a coach, I didn’t truly know what I was getting into. I’d never had a coach before. My only inkling of coaching came from my best friend, Rachael, a fellow Berkeley graduate and journalist-turned-professor, whose expensive but highly effective coach yielded huge perspective shifts and results.
But as my training at the UW Madison coaching program began and I started learning about the International Coaching Federation’s core competencies, I felt growing self-awareness and confidence. I learned to shut up, listen, and with all my senses. I learned to manage my active mind, honor my intuition, connect with the human being I coached, and trust the coaching process — a deceptively difficult one to trust!
My fellow coaches-in-training and I were in great hands. Our instructors and trainers, a trio of strong-willed, sassy, excellent coaches, all aligned on the need to have fun, get messy, and follow the competencies. Our head instructor, Chariti Gent, always reminded us: “Trust the process.” And this meant: Coach the person not the problem. Hold the coachee as capable, competent, and resourceful, no matter what. I translated this wisdom in my Kiwi speak as: Get out of your head, Kiwi girl. Fret not about your novice efforts. Accept that no one perfect question exists. Stop fixing. Listen, sense, share, without attachment, and let the coachee feel and find the answers already within.
Any effort has paid off. Today, I’m writing of a big milestone. Having just counted up my individual coaching hours, at this exact moment, I’ve coached 3,184 individual paid coaching hours since my training began early September 2019. Most hours come from repeat business because I’ve helped coachees make breakthroughs, build strategy, and find vital clarity through being present and following the mantras I outlined earlier.
Writing this, I feel proud and astonished — because that’s a lot. Also, having met this milestone and surpassing 2,500 individual coaching hours back in September, I feel excited and motivated. Now, I can start my process of applying to become a Master Certified Coach, an MCC coach, a credential that the ICF has only granted to 1,725 coaches globally, as of June 2022. (I know the numbers because I wrote to them and checked.)
What will I do with this exciting win and vantage point? A few things. Learn from the MCC credentialing process not only as a coach wanting to master her craft, but also as a journalist, podcaster, and memoirist. I know it’s hard — but how hard? I want to demystify this process for me and other professionals curious about coaching as a career, for leaders wanting to cultivate leadership presence, and for coaches wanting to take their skills and certifications all the way to the top.
I plan to write a memoir (another memoir) on changing careers three years ago at age 49 into an unknown industry and now coaching mid-level managers and executives 40+ times a week. I also launch in January a new podcast chronicling my journey of applying to MCC. I’m trademarking its name currently; but I can say the theme ties to reinvention, coaching, and maintaining presence, which requires quietening our restless, anxious, and doubting mind. When we feel that presence, the joy and breakthroughs that result feel profound. Also, without feeling that presence, I doubt I’d have the stamina to coach. Presence (thinking less about us and more about others) energizes and uplifts.
Why the need for thought leadership alongside the MCC training and application process? Because mine is a tale of reinvention, entrepreneurship, and hopefully an uplifting saga. This story chronicles a New Zealand immigrant who came to the U.S. 26-years ago solo and on a one-way ticket. I arrived in San Francisco, Ca. from Tokyo, Japan where I had worked five years. (I brought with me only a backpack full of photo negatives, books, clothes, and my hopes and dreams.)
Through the happiness I’ve discovered from coaching and the love of my chosen family (my husband Colby, our sons, and my loving American friends) I have secured my American dream. That’s the story I want to tell in hopes that it may inspire clarity in others, too. Do you want to hear it? I hope so. (And if not, please do cheer me on, because that’s what Americans do best, in my humble view.)
Debbi Gardiner McCullough coaches and trains immigrant leaders to become more confident, concise, and mentally fit communicators. From Wisconsin, she owns and runs Hanging Rock Coaching and serves as a communication effectiveness fellow coach to leaders all over the globe with BetterUp.
